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The Trousers Of Time – Donald Trump, Stephen Hawking And The Awful Truth About Time Travel

Escaped cartoon character Donald J Trump – before he moved into The White House- claimed that the penthouse he lived in was on the 66th floor of Trump Tower.

Trump Tower only has 58 floors. Read More…


The Black Dragon – Fakes, Frauds and Kentucky Fried Chicken


That is a photo of one of my childhood heroes. Count Juan Raphael Dante. Martial arts master, founder of The Black Dragon Fighting Society, voodoo priest and alleged bank robber. He came to fame in the 1960s by posting adverts like this in the back of American comic books : Read More…

Toki Pona – Fluency In Silence And The Assassination Of Donald Trump


Apart from a few scintillating highlights, 2016 has been the worst fucking year of my entire life. I don’t feel too badly about it though, because broadly speaking 2016 has been a bad year for pretty much everybody.

So many dead celebrities. So many fallen heroes that looking back on this year is like viewing the killing fields at the end of the first day of The Battle of the Somme. Read More…

Holy Smokes! – How God Wants You To Take Drugs And Why God Is Wrong


I don’t do drugs anymore. Not illegal ones, anyway. Though I am a 46 year old man, so naturally I take all sorts of pills and potions to stop my sorry old carcass from rattling apart when I walk down the street. But I don’t do the fun stuff nowadays. Read More…

POH-TAY-TOE PER-TAR-TOE – How The British Are Far Too Harsh On Americans And Why Americans Can Be Right

You have to feel just a little bit sorry for the Americans. Everyone used to love them and their vibrant culture. Now everyone hates them, though that hasn’t stopped worldwide consumption of Hollywood films and hamburgers. Read More…